In March and April 2022 I was sectioned and in an acute psychotic episode where I believed I was the chosen one, and my blood would purify the land and I had to sacrifice myself to fix the world and end all horrible things like wars and covid etc.

The psychiatrist diagnosed me with schizoaffective bipolar type (essentially meaning I have both schizophrenia and bipolar)

The psychiatrist decided to start me on an anti psychotic called clozapine. This is a strong anti psychotic that can come with a lot of side effects, but that is also really good and used when several other anti psychotics haven’t worked.

I have now been on clozapine about ten months and it has helped.

Still trying to find the correct dose.

Currently struggling with auditory and visual hallucinations, mixed mood and paranoia.

I have to go to a clozapine clinic fortnightly. It was weekly, but then reduced after 18 weeks to fortnightly. And in April it will go to once every four weeks, and stay at once every four weeks for as long as I am on clozapine.

Clozapine clinic involves a blood test, basic observations like pulse, blood pressure and oxygen levels. Questions about side effects. And if my levels from the blood tests are ok I get my clozapine.

However due to having a high level of clozapine in my blood my psychiatrist had to reduce my dose and needed to add in aripirazole (another anti psychotic)

I am hoping that my clozapine can be increased a little bit. As the reduction has affected me quite badly, with the increase in symptoms.

Overall clozapine has really helped me. And others have noticed that as well.

I’m coming to terms with the fact that I will always have schizophrenia symptoms and bipolar symptoms to some varying degrees.

I am on several other psychiatric medications, including lithium which helps with my manic episodes by reducing them.

Clozapine is certainly a drug that is not easily and quickly prescribed. And I was told it is only prescribed to those with a schizophrenia or schizoaffective diagnosis.

For me, so far, clozapine had been worth while going on. And yes there’s the side effects and the regular visits to clozapine clinic.

But for me it’s worthwhile.

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